Ye kaisa sanjog
01-13-2018, 08:52 PM,
#1
Ye kaisa sanjog
Dosto main yaani aapka dost raj sharma ek our mast kahaani lekar haajir hun our ummeed karta hun ki meri baaki kahaaniyon ki tarah ye kahaani bhi aapko pasand aayegi 


Dosto ye ek aisa sanyog thaa apni maan ke saath jiske baare men main aapko bataane ja raha hun . dosto ye tabhi hota hai jab sitare kisi bahut khas mouke par kisi khas disha main line baddh hon. Mere khayal se ise aur kisi tarike se parabhaashit nahi kiya ja sakta. Main ghar ke pichwaade main kyariyon main khoyi apni ball dhudh raha thaa jab maine ma ki awaz apne mata pita ke kamre ke sath attached bathroom ki choti si khidki se aati suni. Khidki thodi si khuli thee aur main usme se apni ma ki phusphusaati awaz ko sun sakta thaa jab wo phone par kisi se baat kar rahi thee. 

Wo vaastav men ek adubhut sanyog thaa. Wo shaayad bathroom main toilet istemaal karne aayi thee aur sanjog vash uske paas mobile thaa, jo apne aap main ek durlabh baat thee kyonki ma bathroom main kabhi mobile lekar nahi jati thee aur sanyogvash main bhi khidki ke itne nazdik thaa ke wo kya baten kar rahi hai saaf saaf sun sakta thaa.

Main koyi jaanbujhkar uski baaten nahi sun raha thaa main to apni ball dhundh raha thaa magar kuch alfaz aise hote hain ki aadmi chah kar bhi unhe nazarandaaz nahi kar sakta, khas kar agar wo alfaz apni sagi ma ke munh se sun raha ho to. Jab maine ma ko wo baat kehte suna to mere kaan khade ho gaye: "ab main tumhe kya batayun. Mujhe to ab yeh bhi yaad nahi hai ke lund ka sparsh kaisa hota hai. Itna samay ho gaya hai mujhe bina sex ke"

Pehle pehal to mujhe apne kaano par yakeen hi nahi huya ke shaayad maine sahi se suna hi nahi hai, main apni saanse rok kar bina koi awaz kiye poore dhyaan se sunane laga.

tab wo kaafi samay tak chup rahi jaise wo phone par dusri aur se bolne wale ko sun rahi thee aur bich bich 'han', 'hunh', 'main janti hun' kar rahi thee. Akhirkaar ant men wo boli "main wo sab karke dekh chuki hun magar koyi fayda nahi. Ab hamari zindagi us padav par pahunch gayi hai jisme sex hamari rojmarra ki jindagi ki zaroorat nahi raha"

Uffff main ab jakar samjha thaa. Meri ma apni sex life se santusht nahi thee aur phone par kisi se shikaayat kar rahi thee ja apna dukhda ro rahi thee. Phone ke usre sire par kon thaa mujhe malum nahi thaa magar jo koyi bhi thaa jahir thaa ma ke bahut nazdik thaa. Isiliye wo us sakhas se itne khulepan aur bharose se baat kar rahi thee. 

Phir se ek lambi chuppi cha jati hai aur wo siraf sunti rehti hai. Tab wo bolti hai "mujhe nahi malum main kya karun, meri samjh main kuch nahi aata. Kabi kabhi mujhe itni ichcha hoti hai chudwane ki, meri choot jaise jal rahi hoti hai, kammouttejna jaise sar chadh kar bolti hai, aur main raat bhar so nahi pati aur wo dusri aur karvat lekar aise sota hai jaise sabh kuch sahi hai, kuch bhi galat nahi hai" 

Maine kabhi bhi ma ko kaamuttejna shabad ke sath jod kar nahi dekha thaa. Wo mere liye itni pooran, itni nishkalank thee ke main janta bhi nahi thaa ke uski bhi sarirak jaroorten theen meri...meri hi terah. Wo mere liye siraf ma thee siraf ma, ek aurat kabhi nahi. 

Main janta thaa ma aur pitaji ek sath sote hain aur mere man ke kisi kone main yeh baat bhi ankit thee ke unke bich aatmiy sambandh the magar ab jab maine apne man ko daudaya aur is baat ki aur dhyaan diya ke aatmiyta ka asli matlab yehan chudayi se thaa. Maine kabhi yeh baat nahi sochi thee ke mere pitaji ne meri ma ko choda hai aur apna lund ma ki choot main ghuseda hai, wo lund jiska ehsaas ma ke anusar wo kabh ki bhul chuki thee. 
Ma aur choot yeh do aise lafaz the jo mere liye ek line main nahi ho sakte the. Meri ma to bas ma thee, poori sudh aur pvitar. Jab uski baatchit ne is aur ishara kiya ke uske paas bhi ek choot hai jo lund ke liye tadap rahi hai. Bas, main aur kuch nahi sunana chahta thaa. Mujhe yeh bhi bhul gaya main wahan kya kar raha thaa ja kya karne gaya thaa. Main wahan se door hat jana chahta thaa itna door ke ma ki awaz na sun sakun



Us din baad main jab maine use rasoyi main dekha to mujhe uski anupsthiti main baichaini si mehsoos hone lagi. Mujhe thoda apradh bodh bhi mehsoos ho raha thaa ke main uski antrang dubidha ko jaan gayaa thaa aur use is baat ki koyi jankari nahi thee. Us apradhbodh ne ma ke liye meri soch ko thoda badal diya thaa. Uski samasya ki jankari ne uske prati mere nazriye main bhi tabdili la di thee. Main shaayad ise sahi dhang se bata to nahi sakta magar mere andar kuch ehsaaas janam lene lag the.

Us din jab wo drawing room main aayi to barbas mera dhyaan uski tango ki aur gaya. Main chahta nahi thaa magar phir bhi khud ko rok nahi paya. Siraf itna hi nahi, meri nazar uski tango se sidhe us sthan par pahunch gayi jehan uski tange apas main mil rahi theen, us sthan par jehan usne na jane kitne samay se lund mehsoos nahi kiya thaa. Upar se wo tight jeans pehne huye thee aur usne apni tshirt jeans ke andar de rakhi thee jis se uski tango ka wo madhay bhag mujhe bahut ache se dikhayi de raha thaa balke thoda ubhra huya nazar aa raha thaa. Uske wo lafaz mere kano main gunj rahe the jab main uski jangho ko ghur raha thaa.

Wo apni favourite jeans pehne huye thee aur wo sthan jehan uski janghe aapas main mil rahi thee wahan thoda gap thaa jo uski choot ko highlight kar raha thaa........khub ubhar kar. Maine ma ko pehle bhi un jeans main dekha thaa magar tango ke bich ka wo gap mujhe kabhi nazar nahi aaya thaa na hi wo tikoni aakar ka bhag. Asliyat main, shaayad maine wo ubhra huya hissa dekha hi nahi thaa, shaayad wo meri kalpana matr thee. uski jeans kafi mote kapde ki bani huyi thee isliye us hisse ko dekhna bahut mushkil thaa magar aaj main use ek aag hi roop main dekh raha thaa..

Uski choot ki aur baar baar dhyan jane se mujhe kuch baichaini mehsoos hone lagi thee. Us raat main so na saka. 

Us raat jab mere mata pita apne kamre main sone ke liye chale gaye to main kalpana karne laga kaise meri ma mere pitaji ke niche hogi aur us lund ko apni choot main le rahi hogi jo usne na jane kitne samay se mehsoos bhi nahi kiya thaa. Maine yeh sabh fitoor apne dimag se nikalne ki bahut koshish ki magar ghoom phir kar wo baten phir se mere dimag main aa jati. Mera dhyaan uski pant ke us gap wale hisse ki aur chala jata aur main kalpana main apne pitaji ke lund ko us gap ko bharte dekhta.

Mere khayal mujhe baichain kar rahe the aur main theek se keh nahi sakta ke mujhe kis baat se jayada pareshani ho rahi thee, is baat se ke ma ki choot baar baar meri ankho ke samne ghoom rahi thee ya fir is khayal se ke mere pitaji use chod rahe honge. 

Agle din mera mood bahut ukhada huya thaa. Mere haav bhav meri halat bata rahe the, khud ma ne bhi pucha ke main theek to hun. Wo us din bhi wohi jeans pehne huye thee magar uske sath ek form fitting T-shirt dali huyi thee. Us din jindgi main pehli baar mera dhyaan ma ke mummon ki aur gya. Ek baargi to mujhe yakeen hi nahi huya ke uske numme itne bade aur itne sundar the. Uske bhari mummo ke ehsas ne meri halat aur bhi patli kar di thee.

Baaki ka poora din mera man uski tango ke jod se uske mummo, uske un gol-matol bhari mummo ke bich uchlata raha. Mere kaano main baar baar uski wo baat gunj uthati ke use ab lund ka ehsaas bhi bhool gaya thaa ke kabhi kabhi usko chudwane ka kitna man hota thaa.
Reply
01-13-2018, 08:52 PM,
#2
RE: Ye kaisa sanjog
Main manta hu use matar ek ma ki terah dekhne ki vajaye ek sundar, kamniy nari ke roop mai dekhne ka badlav mere liye aprtyashit thaa . Aisa lagta thaa jise ek parda uth gaya thaa aur jehan pehle ek dhundhalaka thaa wehan ab main ek aurat ki tasveer saaf saaf dekh sakta thaa. Lagta thaa jaise meri kuch ichchhayen man ki gehrayion main kahin dabi huyi theen jo yeh sunane k baad ubhar kar samne aa gayi thee ke usko kabhi kabhi chudwane ka kitna man hota thaa. Wo jaise badal kar koyi aur ho gayi thee aur mere liye svartha nayi thee. Jehan pehle mujhe uske mummo aur uski jangho ke jod par dekhne se apradhbodh, jhijak mehsoos hota thaa, ab har bitate din ke sath main unhe asani se bina kisi jhijak ke dekhne laga thaa balke jo bhi main dekhta uski apne man main khub jam kar uski tareef bhi karta. Mujhe nahi malum usne is badlav par koyi dhyaan diya thaa ya nahi magar kayi maukon par main badi asani se pakda ja sakta thaa. 

Ek din adhi raat ko main tv dekh raha thaa, mujhe kitchen main ma ke kadmo ki ahat sunai di. Us samay use sote hone chahiy thaa magar wo jaag rahi thee. Wo drawing room main mere paas aayi. Uske hath main juice ka glass thaa. 

"Main bhi tumhare sath tv dekhungi?" wo chote sofe par baith gayi jo bade sofe se nabbe digree ke kone par thaa jis pe main baita hua thaa. Usne nightie pehni huyi the jiska matlab thaa wo soyi thee magar phir uth gyi thee.

"Neend nahi aa rahi" maine pucha. Mere dimag main uski telephone wali baatchit gunj uthi jisme usne keha thaa ke kabhi kabhi use chudwane ki itni jabardast ichcha hoti hi ke use neend nahi aati. Main sochne laga kya us samay bhi uski wohi halat hai, ke shaayad wo kaam ki aag main jal rahi hai aur use neend nahi aa rahi hai, isiliye wo tv dekhne aayi hai. Is baat ka ehsaas hone par ke main ati kamottejit nari ke sath hun mera badan sehar utha.

Wo wahan baithkar aram se juice pine lagi , use dekhkar lagta thaa jaise use koyi jaldbazi nahi thee, juice khatam karke vaapas apne bedroom main jane ki. Jab uska dhyaan tv ki aur thaa to meri nazren chori chori uske badan ka muyana kar rahi thee. Uske mote aur thos mummon ki aur mera dhyaan pehle hi ja chuka thaa magar its baar maine gaur kiya uski tange bhi behad khubsurt thee. Sofe pe baithne se uski nightie thodi upar uth gayi thee aur uske ghutno se thoda upar takk uski jangho ko dhamp rahi thee.

Shaayad raat bahut guzar chuki thee, ja tv par adhi raat ko parveen babi ke dilkash jalwe dekhne ka asar thaa, magar mujhe ma ki janghen bahut pyari lag rahin thee. balke sahi lafzon main bahut sexy lag rahi thee. Sexy, yehi wo lafaz tha jo mere dimag main gunja thaa jab hum dono tv dekh rahe the ja mere case main, tv dekhne ka natak kar raha thaa. Asliyt main agar mujhe kuch dikhayi de raha thaa to wo uski sexy janghe thee aur yeh khayal mere dimag main ghum reh thaa ke wo is samay shaayad wo bahut kamottejit hai.

wo kafi samay wahan baithi rahi, ant main bolte huye uth khadi huyi "offf! raat bahut guzar gayi hai. Main ab sone ja rahi hun" 

Main kuch nahi bola. Wo uth kar mere pass goodnight bolne ko aayi. Normally raat ko ma vida lete huye mere hontho par ek halka sa chumban leti thee jaisa mere bachpan se chala aa raha thaa. Wo siraf sukhe hontho se sukhe hontho ka kshanik sparsh matar hota thaa aur us raat bhi kuch aisa hi thaa, ek sukha, halka sa lagbhag na malum hone wala chumban. Magar us raat us chumban ke arath badal gaye the, kyonki mere dimag main uske kamuk ango ki dhundhali si tasveeren ubhar rahi theen. Wo ek halka sa achi mehak wala perfume dale huye thee jisne meri dasha aur bhi kharab kar di. Main uttejit hone laga thaa. 

Main use mudh kar room ki aur jate dekhta raha. Uska silky, soft nightgown uske badan ke har katav hagayer mod har golayi ka anusaran kar raha thaa. Wo uski gand ke ubhar aur dhalan se chipka huya uske chutdon ke bich ki khayi main halka sa dhans huya thaa. Us drishy se ma ko ek sundar, kamniy nari ke roop main dekhne ke mere badlav ko pooran kar diya thaa. 

"Ma kitni sundar hai, kitni sexy hai" main khud se dohrata ja raha thaa. Magar uski sundarta kis kaam ki! Wo akarshak aur kamniy nari har rat mere pitaji ke paas unke bed par hoti thee magar phir bhi unke andar wo ichcha nahi hoti thee ke us kamottejit nari se kuch karen. Mujhe pitaji ke is ravayiye par vakayi main bahut hairat ho rahi thee. 

Muhe is baat par bhi tajjub ho raha thaa ke meri ma achanak se mujhe itni sundar aur akarshak kyon lagne lagi thee. Viase ye itna bhi achanak se nahi thaa magar yakayak ma mere liye itni khoobsurat, itni kamniy ho gayi thee is baat ka kuch matlab to nikalta thaa. Kyon mujhe wo itni akarshak aur sexy lagne lagi thee? Mujhe ehsaas thaa ke is sabki suruaat mujhe ma ki apuran jismani khawahison ki jankari hone ke baad huyi thee, Lekin phir bhi wo meri ma thee aur main uska beta aur ek beta hone ke nate mere liye un baton ka jyada matlab nahi hona chahiye thaa. Uski hasraten kisi aur ke liye theen, mere liye nahi, mere liye bilkul bhi nahi. 

Agar us samay main kuch soch sakta thaa to siraf apni hasraton ke bare main, aur ma ke liye mere dil main paida ho rahi hasraten. Magar phir main uski khawahish kyon kar raha thaa? Kya wakayi wo meri khawahish ban gayi thee? Mere paas kisi swal ka jwab nahi thaa. Yeh baat ke woh kabhi kabhi bahut uttejit ho jati thee aur yeh baat ke uski jismani hasraten poori nahi hoti theen, ne ma ke prati mere andar kuch ehsaas jaga diye the. Yeh baat ke wo chudwane ke liye tarasti hai, magar mera pita use chodta nahi hai, is baat se mere dimag main yeh vichar aane laga ke shaayad isme main uski kuch madad kar sakta thaa. Magar hamara rishta raste main ek bahut badi badha thee, isliye vastav main uske sath kuch kar pane ki sambhavna mere liye nabrabar hi thee. Magar mere dimag ke kisi kone main yeh vichar jarur janam le chuka thaa ke koshis karne main koyi haraz nahi hai. Us sambhavnaf ne ek marad hone ke nate ma ke liye mere jazbaton ko aur bhi mazboot kar diya thaa chahe wo sambhavna na ke brobar thee. 

Jyadatar main raat ko kafi late sota thaa, yeh adat meri school dino se ban gayi thee jab main adhi raat takk padhayi karta thaa, college join karne ke baad se yeh aadat aur bhi pakki ho gayi thee. Mera jyadatar waqat computer par kaam karte guzarta thaa magar ma ke bare main wo jankari haasil hone ke baad, aur jab se mujhe is baat ka ehsaas huya thaa ke ma ka badan kitna kamuk hai wo kitni sexy hai, aur uski upsthiti main jo kamniy anand mujhe prapat hone laga thaa usase main ab tv dekhne ko trjeeh dene laga thaa. Main aksar drawing room main baith kar tv dekhta aur asha karta ke wo aayegi aur mujhe phir se wohi anand prapat hoga.

Ma ka dhyaan meri nayi dincharya ki aur jane main thoda waqat laga. Suru suru main wo kabhi kabhi sanyog se wahan aa jati aur thoda waqar baithati, aur tv par mer sath kuch dekhti. Magar jalad hi wo niymit taur par mere sath baithne lagi. Magar wo kabhi bhi lambe smay takk nahi baithati thee magar itna samay kafi hota thaa ek sukhad ehsas ke liye. Mujhe laga wo ghar main apni mojudagi ka kisi ko ehsas karwana chahti thee

Raat ko jane ke time uski wishes kayi baar juwani hoti thee, wo halk se goodnight bol deti thee aur kayi bar wo halka sa hontho se hontho ka sparsh, wo ek sukha sa sparsh matar hota thaa aur mere khyal se wo kisi bhi prakar chumban keh kar nahi pukara ja sakta thaa. Jo garmahat mujhe pehle pehale ma ke chumban se hoti thee wo samay ke sath unki aadat hone se jati rahi. Un chumbano main na koyi asar hota thaa aur na hi unka koyi khas matlab hota thaa. Wo to siraf hamare vida lene ki opcharkita matar thee, ek esi opcharkita jiski mujhe koyi khas parwah nahi thee.



Main apni purani dincharya ki aur laut gaya aur apna sara samay phir se apne computer pe bitane laga. Ab adhi raat takk tv dekhne main wo maza hi nahi thaa jaisa pehle aya karta thaa. Ma ko mere faisle ki malumat nahi thee. Pehle hi din jab usne mujhe drawing room se ndarad paya to wo mere room main mujhe dekhne ko aayi.

"aaj tv nahi dekhoge kya"

"nahi, mujhe apna project poora karna hai" maine bahana banaya.

"oh!" wo thodi nirash lagi, kam se kam mujhe to aisa hi jaan pada.

Kehne ke liye aur kuch nahi thaa, magar wo abhi jana nahi chahti thee. Wo bed ke kinare par baith gayi aur table par se ek magazine uthakar uske panne paltane lagi. Main busy hone ka natak karta raha, aur wo chupchap magazine main khoyi rahi. Kuch der baad maine use magazine vaapas rakhte suna. "Theek hai, main chalti hun" wo khadi hokar boli.

Maine apni kursi uski aur ghuma li aur keha, "mera kaam lagbhag khatam ho chuka hai ma, agar tum chaho to thodi der main hum tv dekhne chalte hain"

"nahi, nahi. Tum padahyi karo" Usne jwab diya aur meri taraf aayi. Ab yeh hissa kuch arath liye huya thaa.

Shaayad mera ye andaza galat ho ke mujhe drawing room main tv dekhte na pakar wo thoda nirash ho gayi thee, magar jab wo mujhse vida lene ke samay chumabn lene aayi to maine uske hav bhav main ek nischay dekha aur is baar mere man main koyi sandeh nahi thaa jaise juwani vida ki jegah wo chumban lekar koyi baat jatana chahti thee.
Reply
01-13-2018, 08:53 PM,
#3
RE: Ye kaisa sanjog
Main thoda aage ko jhuk gaya aur uske goodnight chumban ka intezar karne laga. Aam taur par wo thoda sa jhuk jar apne honth mere hontho se chuya deti thee. Uske hath uski kamar par hote the. Magar us raat usne apna dayan hath mere bayen kandhe par rakha aur phir mujhe wo chumban diya ya mera chumban liya. Maine ise mehaj itefaq mana aur ise koyi gupat ishara samgh kar iska koyi dusra arath nahi nikala. Karan yeh thaa ke main kursi par baitha huya thaa na ke sofe par, isiliye use balance ke liye mere kandhe par hath rakhna pada thaa. Magar wo chumban aaj kuch alag terah ka thaa, isme koyi shak nahi thaa.

Yeh koyi bahhut badi baat nahi thee, magar mujhe laga ke wo hamare ekkathe baithne, sath sath tv dekhne ki aas lagaye baithe thee, use kisi ke sath ki jaroorat thee. Shaayad wo hamare adhi raat takk drawing room ke sath ki aadi ho gayi thee aur mere wahan na hone par usase raha nahi gaya thaa. Mujhe uske chumban se uski nirasha jhalkati dikhayi di.

Tabhi woh khayal mere man main aaya thaa.


Agar uske liye chumban ka ehsaas badlana sambhav thaa to mere liye bhi sambhav thaa chahe kisi aur tarike se hi sahi.

Jitna jyada main is bare main sochta utna hii jyada iske natije ko lekar uttejit hota gyaa. Jab se maine use kehte suna thaa ke wo chudwane ke liye tadap rahi hai tabse mere andar ek jwala si dhadhak rahi thee. Us jwala ki lapten aur bhi tez ho jati jab wo mere sath akeli adhi raat takk tv dekhti thee. Uski phone wali baatchit se main janta thaa ke wo kabhi kabhi itni uttejit hoti thee ke use raat ko neend nahi aati thee. Mujhe lagta thaa ke jab jab wo adhi raat ko tv dekhne aati thee uski wohi halat hoti hogi, chahe mere karan nahi magar ati kamottejna ki halat main to wo hoti hi thee.


Agar us din bhi uski wohi halat thee jab wo mere sath thee to kya wo meri aur hasrat se dekhegi? Jaise main uski aur dekhta thaa? kya uske riday main bhi wohi aag jal rahi thee jo mere dil main jal rahi thee? Kya yeh sambhav thaa ke uske andar ki aag ko proksh roop se aur bhadka diya jaye take kam se kam wo meri aur kisi dusri bhavn se dekh sake jaise main uski aur dekhta thaa? Kya main uske dimag main wo vichar daal sakta thaa ke main uski samsayon ke samadhan ki ek sambahvna ho sakta hun, chahe wo siraf ek vichar hota isase jyada kuch nahi.

Mere liye in swalon ke jwab janane ka koyi sadhan nahi thaa, mera matlab ke agar main suruaat bhi karta to kahan se. Kayi baar mujhe lagta jaise main uski baichaini ko uski akulahat ko mehsoos kar sakta hoon magar wo siraf ek andaza hota. Main yakeen se kuch nahi keh sakta thaa. Koyi aisa rasta nahi thaa jisase ek ishara bhar hi mil jata je wo kaise mehsoo karti hai.

Uske chumban ne uski kuch bhavnayon se bagavat jaroor ki thee magar unka us sabh se koyi vasta nahi thaa jo main janana chaht thaa. Jaroor use nirasha huyi thee jab main uska sath dene ke liye wahan nahi thaa magar wo prabhav ek manovagyanik thaa. Use mera sath acha lagta thaa isliye uska nirash hona sambhav thaa jab uska beta use company dene ke liye wahan mojud nahi thaa. Main use kisi aur vejah se nirash dekhna achahta thaa. Chahe ek alag trike se hi sahi magar main ek jaroort poori kar raha thaa, ek bete ki terah nahi balke ek marad ki terah. Main wo janana chahta thaa. Main mehsoos karna chahta thaa ke jismani jaroorat poori karne ki sambhavnamagar hamare bich mojud thee, chahe wo siraf ek sambhavna hoti aur hum us par kabhi amal na karte.

Ab achanak se maine mehsoos kiya ke mere paas ek mauka hai kam se kam ye pata karne ka main kitne pani main hoon. Agar main chumban ko apni traf se kisi terah koyi alag roop de saku, use ek ishara bhar kar saku, use ek alag ehsas kara saku, us chingari ko jo usk andar dehak rahi thee hawa dekar ek marad ki terah bhadka saku na ke ek bete ki terah tab shaayad main ki sambhavna ka pata laga sakunga. 

Us raat main bahut bahut der takk sochta raha, aur ek yojna banane laga ke kis terah main hamari ratri ke chumbano main kuch badlav kar unme kuch ehsaas daal saku.

Jab main natije ke bare main alag alag dishayon se socha to uttejna se merathank you badan kampane laga. Ek taraf yehan main yeh soch kar bahut uttejit ho raha thaa ke agar maine apni yojna anusar kam kiya to uska natija kya hoga. Wahin dusri aur mujhe apni yojna ke vipreet natije se bhay bhi mehsoos ho raha thaa. Uski pratikirya ya to skaratamik ho sakti thee, jisme wo kuch esi pratikiriya deti jo is agg ko aur bhadka deti, ya phir uski pratikirya nkaratmak hoti jisase us sambhavana ke sabhi dwar hamesha hamesha ke liye band ho jate jo sambhavna asliyat main kabhi mojud hi nahi thee.

Ab yojna bahut hi sadharan si thee. Main uski suksham pratikirya ko ek ishara man kar chal raha thaa aur iske sath apne tarike se ek pryog karke dekhna chahta thaa. Chahe yeh kuch bewkoofana jaroor lag sakta thaa magar meri yojna se mujhe wo suyi mil sakti thee jo main us ghas phoos ke bhari dher se dhundh raha thaa

Jaisa ke main pehle hi keh chuka hun hamare ratri vida ke chumban hamesha sukhe, halke se aur namlum hone wale hontho ka hontho se sparash matar hote the. Agar--main khud se dohrata ja raha thaa----Agar wo itne sukhe na rahen to? Main apne honth uske hontho par daba to nahi sakta thaa kyonki wo maryada ke khilaf hota lekin agar mere honth sukhe na rahen to? Agar usko hontho par mukhras ka ehsas hoga to? Tab uski pratikirya kya hogi? Kya wo iska jwab degi?!


Jitna jayada main apni yojna ko vyavharik roop dene ke bare main sochta raha utnana hi jyada main andolit hota gaya. Meri halat esi thee ke us raat main so bhi na saka, bas usase positive reaction milne ke bare main sochta raha.

Agki raat main plan ke mutabik tv ke aage thaa. wo aayi, jaisi main umeed lagaye baitha thaa ke wo aayegi aur mujhe wahan mojud dekhkar shaayad thodi excited hogi. Magar wo chehre se kuch bhi excitement ya khushi dikha nehi rahi thee, isase mujhe nirasha huyi aur apni yojna ko lekar main phir se sochne laga ke mujhe wo karna chahiye ja nahi magar nirash hone ke bavjood maine plan ko amal main lane ka faisla kiya. Hamesha ki terah hum kuch samay takk tv dekhte rahe, ant main wo boli, "mujhe sona chahiye beta! Raat bahut ho gayi hai"

" ok" maine jwab diya aur apne sukhe hontho par jaldi se jibh feri. 

Wo meri aur nahi dekh rahi thee jab maine apne hontho par jibh feri. Maine phir se char panch vaar aise hi kiya take honth achhe se gile ho jayen. Main hontho se laar nahi tapkana chahta thaa magar unhe itna gila kar lena chahta thaa ke wo us gilepan ko, mere ras ko mehsoos kar sake. Uske baad maine khud ko uski pratikiriya ke liye tyaar kar liya.

Mera dil bade zoron se dhadakane laga jab wo mere sofe ki aur aayi. Main thoda sa aage jo jhuk gaya take usko mere honthon takk pahunchane main asani ho sake. Main khud ko sanyyat karne ke liye mukh se saans lene laga jiske falsrup mere honth kuch sukh gaye. Maine jaldi jaldi jibh nikal hontho par feri take unhe phir se gila kar saku bilkul uske chumban se pehle, mujhe nahi malum usne mujhe aisa karte dekh liya tha ja nahi. 

Jab ma ke honth mere hontho se chuye to meri ankh band ho gyee. Mera chehra aavesh main jalte huye lal ho gaya thaa. Mujhe apni saans rokni padi, kyonki main nahi chahta thaa ke meri bhari ho chuki saans uske chehre pa itne zor se takraye.

Hontho ke gile hone se chumban ki sansanahat badh gayi thee. Yeh wo pehle wala aam sa, lagbhag na malum chalne wala hontho ka sparash nahi thaa. Aaj main hamare hontho ke sparsh ko bhali bhanti mehsoos kar sakta thaa, au mujhe yakeen tha usne bhi ise mehsoos kiya thaa.

Wo dhire se 'goodnight' phusphusayi aur apne room main jane ke liye mud gayi. Uski aur se koyi spashat pratikiriya nazar nahi aayi thee halanke mujhe yakeen thaa wo apne hontho par mera mukhras lekar gayi thee. Kuch bhi aisa asadharan nahi thaa jis par main ungli rakh sakta. Aisa lagta thaa jaise hamara wo chumban uske liye baki dino jaisa hi aam chumban thaa. Kuch bhi farak nahi thaa. Main use alag banana chahta thaa, aur umeed lagaye baitha thaa ke uska dhyaan us antar ki aur jayega magar nahi aisa kuch bhi nahi huya. Ab nirash hone ki bari meri thee. Jitna main pehle aaveshit thaa ab utna hi hatash ho gaya thaa.
Reply
01-13-2018, 08:53 PM,
#4
RE: Ye kaisa sanjog
Maine kisi sakratmak ya nakaratmak pratikiriya ki aasha ki thee. Apne bed pe leta huya main us raat bahut thaka huya, jazbati taur par nirash aur hatash thaa. Main kisi nkaratmak prtikiriya ko asani se swikar kar leta magar koyi bhi pratikiria na milne ki sthiti ke liye main bilkul bhi tyaar nahi thaa. Us raat jab main neend ke liye bed par karvaten badal raha thaa, to mera dhyaan apne lund par gaya jo mere josh se thoda akda huya thaa iske bavjood ke baad main mujhe nirasha hath lagi thee.


Meri nirasha agle din bhi mere sath rahi. Nirasha ke sath sath atamgilani aur sharam ka ehsaa ho raha thaa. Jo maine kiya thaa wo samaj, kudrat, maan mariyada ke khilaaf thaa isliye mere man main aisa karne ke liye pachtawe ka ehsaas bhi ho raha thaa. Aglli raat jab hamare drawing room main tv dekhne ka time ho gya to main lagbhag nahi jane wala thaa. Main shaayad apne kamre main hi rukta magar ye baat ke mere najanen se wo mere room main aa sakti hai maine tv room jane main hi bhlayi samjhi. Ab maine jo dhun banayi thee, uska saamna karne ka waqat thaa.

Uske vyabhaar main koyi bhi badlav dikhayi nahi de raha thaa Jo shaayad ek achi baat thee. Uski koyi bhi pratikiriya na dekh mujhe badi rahat huyi thee nake pichli raat ki terah jab uski koyi bhi pratikiriya na dekh main nirash ho gaya thaa. Mujhe ehsaas huya ke hamari dincharya main kisi tabdili ke liye main abhi tyaar nahi thaa. Maine achanak mehsoos kiya ke raat ko ma ke sath ekktthe samay bitane se mujhe bhi khushi milti hai. Is sath se ma ke dwara meri bhi ek zaroorat poori hoti thee chahe manovagyanik taur par hi sahi.

Maine hamare chumban main thoda sa badlav kar unko thoda thos banane ki koshish ki thee aur main aisa bina koyi sanket diye ja bina kuch jataye karne main safal raha thaa. Meri sharam aur atamgilani dhire dhire is rahat se gayab hone lagi ke main bina koyi keemat chukaye ja bina koyi saja paye saaf bach nikla thaa.

Halanke mere vartav main tabdili aa gayi thee. Mera usko dekhne ka nazriya badal gaya thaa. Use dekhte huye mujhe ab utni baichaini mehsoos nahi ho rahi thee. Maine ek kadam aur aage badha diya thaa aur usne mujhe na kosa tha thaa na hi koyi apatti jatayi thee. Us raat ma ko niharne main mujhe ek alag hi anand prapat ho raha thaa. Yeh baat yuda thee ke main yakeen se nahi keh sakta thaa ke jo kuch huya thaa use uski koyi bhanak bhi lagi thee.


Fir se wohi sabh kuch, hum baithe tv dekh rahe the , usne keha "beta! Main chalti huun, raat bahut ho gayi hai". Is vaar maine apne honth gile nahi kiye. Chahe mujhe koyi nakaratmak pritikiriya nahi mili thee phir bhi maine raat ka tajuraba dohrane ki himmat nahi ki. Main aage ko hokar thoda sa jhuk gaya aur uske chumne ka intejar karne laga take main bhi apne room main ja saku aur us sukhad meethe ehsaas main khud ko dubo saku jiski lehren mere jism main ghoom rahi heen.

Uske honth rojana ki terah mere hontho se chuye jisme mere mehsoos karne eke liye kuch bhi khaas nahi thaa.

Magar maine kuch mehsoos kiya, kuch halka sa, alag sa.


Magar maine kuch mehsoos kiya, kuch halka sa, alag sa.

Yeh bilkul halka sa thaa, lagbhag na mehsoos hone wala. Mere dilo dimag main koyi sandeh nahi thaa ke maine uske hontho ko halke se, bilkul halke se sikudate mehsoos kiya thaa. Jaise hamare honth kisi ke gaal par chumban lete huye sikudate hain theek vaise hi lekin bahut mahin se. Ye meri ma ka hontho se hontho ka sparsh nahi thaa balke ek chumban thaa. Yeh pehli baar thaa jab ma ke hontho ne mere hontho par koyi halchal ki thee.. Aam halaton main, main ise uske hontho ka asamay sikudana maan kar radd kar deta magar ye kudrati taur par hone ki vajaye svaichchik jayada jaap raha thaa. Ek halka chumban hone ke ilawa ek hlka sa, mahin sa dwab bhi thaa jo uske hontho ne mere hontho par lgaya thaa.

Agle din bhar main bahut pareshan raha. Main bas yehi soche ja raha thaa ke yeh vastav main huya thaa ja yeh sabh meri klapana ki upaj thee kyonki main pehle se kuch acha hone ki umeed lagaye baitha thaa. Kya wo bhi meri terah hamare chumban ko aur jyada gehra banana chahti thee ya phir iske ulat wo chumban ko aur gehra hone se rokne ki mehaj koshish kar rahi thee jaise mere hontho ke gilepan ne jo ehsas hamare chumban main bhara thaa wo usko rokna chahati hogi jisase hontho ko sikodne se wo shaayad pakka kar rahi thee ke uske hontho ka kam se kam hissa mere hontho ko chuye.

Apni jigyasa shant karne ke liye jaroori thaa ke main ise ek baar phir se mehsoos karta. Mujhe uske sath kal raat jaisi sthiti main hona thaa aur is baar main hamare subh ratri chumban ki har tafseel par poora dhyaan dene wala thaa. Main is baat par bhi tarak vitark kar raha thaa ke mujhe apne honth gil karne chahiye ja nahi magar isase halaton main badlav ho jata. Mujhe kal hi ki terah aaj bhi apne honth sukhe rakhne the aur phir dekhna tha ke uske honth kaya kamal dikhate hain!

Wo sham aur raat suru hone ka samay aur bhi baichaini bhara thaa, magar utna baichaini bhara nahi thaa jitna jab hum tv dekh rahe the, tab thaa jab main apne subhratri chumban ka intezar kar raha thaa aur samay lag reh thaa jaise tham gaya ho. Wo intezar bhut kashatdayi thaa.

Magar ant main uske jane ka samay ho gaya au hamare ratri vida ke us chumban ka bhi.

Main hamesha ki terah aage ko jhuk gaya. Maine apni ankhe band kar leen take main apna poora dhyaan us chumban par kendrit kar saku.

Maine uske honth apne hontho par mehsoos kiye.
Magar maine uske hontho ka koyi bhi dwab apne hontho par mehsoos nahi kiya jaisa maine pichli raat mehsoos kiya thaa. Usne apne honth bhi nahi sikode jaise usne pichli dafa kiya thaa.

Magar phir bhi kuch alag thaa, kuch antar thaa. Mera upar ka honth uske band hontho ki ghrayi main asani se phisal gaya.

Jaahir thaa is baar usne apne honth gile kiye the.

Ab yeh matar ek sanjog thaa ja phir usne janbujhkar unhe gila kiya thaa, main kuch nahi keh sakta thaa kyonki maine use apne honth gile karte nahi dekha thaa. Maine unka gilapan tabhi mehsoos kiya thaa jab wo mere hontho chuye the. Main yeh maan kar nahi chal sakta thaa ke usne aisa jaanbujhkar kiya thaa, chahe usne aisa jaanbujhkar kiya ho to bhi. Magar ek baat tayy thee; agar usne unhe janbujhkar gila kiya thaa to iska matlab wo bhi hamare ratri chumban ko aur thos banana chahti thee, usme aur jayada gehrayi chahti thee, theek vaise hi jaise maine koshish ki thee hamare chumban ko aur gehra banane ki, usme aur ehsaas jagane ki.

Main uske hontho ki nami apne hontho par mehsoos kar sakta thaa bbalke jab baad main maine apne honth chate to uska swad bhi le sakta thaa. Main soch raha thaa ke kya usne bhi mere hontho ka gilapan aise hi mehsoos kiya thaa aur kya usne bhi uska swad chakha thaa jise maine uska chakha thaa. Kya usko bhi mera mukhras meetha laga thaa jaise uska mukhras mujhe mitha laga thaa. Main uske jane ke kafi samay baad takk apne hontho ko chatata raha take chumban ka wo swad aur sansnahat bani rahe.

Meri ma ne mujhe subhratri ke liye nahi chuma thaa. Meri ma ne mujhe asliyat main chuma thaa chahe bahut halke se hi sahi. Chahe wo janbujhkar kiya thaa chahe wo siraf ek sanjog thaa, meri jangho ke bich paththar ki terah kathor lund ko us antar ka pata nahi thaa. Us raat mujhe neend bahut der baad aayi kyonki mujhe buri terah akade lund ke sath sona pada thaa.

Hairat ki baat thee ke agle din mujhe sharam aur atamglani ka ehsaas pehle ki tulna bahut kam ho raha thaa. Maine apni sagi ma ke karan huyi apni uttejna ko swikar liya thaa aur uske karan hone wali apni uttejna ko lekar ab sant thaa. Apni ma ke bare main esi bhavnayen rakhna sahi thaa---- jab takk ke wo siraf mere dimag takk simat thee. Halanke hamare bich hani rahit mann ko gud-gudane wala ek khel chal raha thaa, magar antetah yeh ek khel hi thaa, mujhe nahi lagta thaa ye bahut aage takk badhega. Akhirkar wo meri ma thee. Main uske karan uttejit ho sakta thaa aur shaayad isme kuch galat nahi thaa. Magar main uske sath wo sabh nahi kar sakta thaa, jo ek mrad meri ma jaisi sundar, kamuk aur madakata se bharpoor nari ke sath karna chahega. Hamara rishta iski ijajat nahi deta thaa.

Chahe hum dono ne ek dusre ko gile hontho se chuma thaa, magar ye hamare bich kuch badlane ke liye nakafi thaa. Agar usne bhi apne honth svaichcha se gile kiye the to humne yeh maan kar aisa kiya thaa ke dusre ko hamari mansha ki malumat nahi hai, aur humne yeh sambhavit asivkarta ke tehat kiya thaa. Matlab agar humme se ek aitraj jatata to dusra bholepan ka natak kar saaf saaf mukar sakta thaa ke hamare un chumbano main usne kuch bhi joda hai aur wo siraf ma bete ke bich sadharan 'goodnight' chumban hain. Hum us seema pe halka sa dwab bana rahe the magar asliyat main hum yeh kabhi kabool nahi kar sakte the ke hum seema par koyi dwab daal rahe the. Kuch tha to jaroor magar hum us kuch ko theek se padh nahi pa rahe the. Aur hum us kuch par amal to bilkul bhi nahi kar sakte the. Jis pal humame ek us kuch par amal karta to dusra khudbakhud usase bhag khada hota. Yehi hamari niyati thee.
Maine apne prayog ko kuch aur main viksit hone ki umeed nahi ki thee. Yeh har rerah se ek hanirahit prayog thaa jo hamare tanha dilon ko raat ke akelepan main thoda gudguda sakta, humame thoda josh bhar sakta, nason main behte thande khoon main thodi garmi la sakta magar yeh kuch bada hone ki bhumika nahi ban sakta thaa. Wo meri ma thee aur main uska beta thaa. Kudrat ki aur se maryada ki rekha khinchi gayi thee aur wo rekha kabhi bhi paar nhi ki ja sakti thee---kabhi bhi nhi.
Reply
01-13-2018, 08:53 PM,
#5
RE: Ye kaisa sanjog
Main thoda sa udas aur kuch nirash thaa is soch se ke us rekha ko kabhi paar nahi kiya ja sakta. Jaroor hamare pass ek dusre ko dene ke liye kuch thaa magar hum wo dusre ko de nahi sakte the. Main bina kisi spasht karan khud ko hatash mehsoos kar raha thaa aur dil par itna bojh mehsoos ho raha thaa ke agle din main tv dekhne bhi nahi gaya.

EK baar phir se main apne room main hi raha. Asliyat main, main uska dhyaan aur bhi pni aur khinchna chahta thaa, kyonki mujhe yakeen thaa ke tv room main meri anupsthiti ki aur uska dhyaan jayega aur wo jaroor koshih karegi dikhane ki ke use hamare raat ke sath ki kami mehsoos ho rahi hai. Asliyat main, main ek parman ke liye taras raha thaa ke use bhi hamare sath ki bahut jaroorat hai.

Wo mujhe dekhne ayi, jaisie maine umeed ki thee ke wo aayegi, jaise mera dil chahta thaa ke wo aaye.

Main apne computer par kam nahi kar raha thaa isliye pichli baar ka bahana nahi bana sakta thaa. Main bed par bitha huya thaa aur soch raha thaa.

"Beta tum theek to ho" usne naram swar main pucha.

"Haan, main theek hun ma. Bas thodi thakawat si mehsoos ho rahi hai" 

Wo thodi asmanjas main nazar aa rahi thee. Main leta huya nahi thaa jaisa ke muhe hona chahiye thaa agar main vaakayi main bahut thaka huya hota. Main to bas bed par aram se baitha huya thaa. Uske chehre par chinta ke badal mandrane lage aur main bata nahi sakta thaa ke wo chinta kis vishay main kar rahi hai. Main uske haab-bhav padhne ki koshiah ar teha thaa ke shaayad mujhe kuch sanket mil jaye. Magar mujhe kuch na mila.
Reply
01-13-2018, 08:53 PM,
#6
RE: Ye kaisa sanjog
Mujhe aisa lag jaise wo kuch kehna chahti thee mgar wo alfaz kehne ke liye wo khud ko tyaar na kar saki. Main bhi kuh kehna chahta thaa magar kya kahun ye meri samagh main nahi aa raha thaa. Antetah wo door ki au mudi aur bina goodnight bole jane lagi. 

Uska is terah bina kuch bole jana khud main ek khas baat thee. Main shaayad uske sath jyadati kat raha thaa. Maine usko is samasaya se ubarne ka faisla kiya. Maine khud ko bhi is samasya se bach nikalne ka mauka diya.

"Agar tum thoda sa samay dogi to main abhi aata huun. Phir milkar tv dekhenge ma" Hamari dubidha, hamara sankoch, hamari sharam, agar hum ye sabh mehsoos karte the to ise katam karne aur vaapas pehle wale hlaton main lautane ka sabse badhiya tarika yehi thaa ke hum sabh kuch bhul kar aise vartav karte jaise kuch huya hi na ho.

Maine dekh sakta thaa ke uske kandhon se ek bhari bogh utar gaya thaa kyonki wo ekdam se khil uthi thee, mujhe bhi ekdam se achha mehsoos hone laga. Pichli raat kuch bhi ghatit nahi huya thaa. Humne kuch bhi nahi kiya thaa, aur humne galat to bilkul bhi kuch nahi kiya thaa.

Humne tv on kiya. Is baar humne ek do vishyon par halki fulki baten bhi ki. Kisi karan hamare bich pehle ke mukable jyada hel-mel thaa. Hum men kuch dostana ho gya thaa. Halanke hamara ratri milan chota thaa magar pehle ke muqabke jyada arathpuran thaa. Humne ise ek dusre ko goodnight bol khatam kiya aur ek dusre ke hontho pe halka sa chumban liya- ek halka, sukha aur namalum padne wala chumban. Uske baad hum dono apne apne kamron main chale gaye. 

Uske baad ke ane wale dino main maine uske chumban ke us meethe swad ko apni yaadashat main taza rakhne ki bahhut koshish ki. Humne apni rozana ki jindagi vaise hi chalu rakhi jisme hum ikaththe baithkar tv dekhte, kuch batchit karte aur phir raat ka ant ek ratri chumban se karte- ek halke, sukhe aur namalum chalne wale chumbn se. 

Main itna zaroor kahunga ke hamare bich gile chumbano ke pehle ki tulna main ab hel-mel badh gaya thaa. Hamare bich ek aisa sambandh viksit ho raha thaa jisne humen aur bhi karib la diya thaa. Hum ab vaastav main ek dusre se aur ek dusre ke bare main khul kar jyada baatchit karne lage the. Aisa lagta thaa jise uske paas kehne ke liye bahaut kuch thaa kyonki main bahut der takk baitha uski baten sunta rehta jo aam taur par rojmarra ki jindgi ki sadharan ghatnayon par hoti theen. 

Ab is padav par main do cheezen jaroor batana chahunga. Pehli to yeh ke bina apne pita ka dhyaan khinche hamare liye ye kaise mumkin thaa itna samay eksath bita pana? Dusra, apni dincharya uski pitaji ke sath dincgarya se alag rakhna hamare liye kaise mumkin thaa? 

Hamara ghar english ke u-shap ke akar main bana huya hai. Mere pitaji ka bedroom left leg ke akhiri kone pe hai, jabke kitchen right leg ke akhiri kone pe hai. Kitchen ke baad drawing room hai jisme hum tv dekhte hain. Drawing room ke baad mera kamra hai. Mere kamre ke baad ek aur kamra hai. Uske baad pitaji ke side wali left leg suru hoti hai, jehan ek kamra hai aur uske baad mere mata pita ka bedroom. Mere pitaji ki side ke corridor main ek bada glass door thaa jo ek verandeh main khulta thaa jiske dusre sire par meri taraf ke corridor aur kitchen ke bicho bich thaa. Din ke samay ma apne corridor se us glaas door ka istemal kar kitchen main aati jati thee. Raat ke samay verandeh ke door band hote the isliye pehle use kitchen se drwing room jana padta thaa aur wahan se corridor main jo mere room ke samne se guzarta thaa phir mere room ke sath wala kamra, phir dusri teraf ka kamra aur ant main pitaji ka kamra. 

Pitaji ke kamre se drawing room ki doori kafi lambi thee jisas unke liye ghar ki is side par kaya ho raha hai, sun pana ya dekh pana namumkin thaa. Hum kam awaz main bina unko pareshan kiye tv dekh sakte the ja baatchit kar sakte the kyonki tv ki awaz kabhi bhi un takk nahi pahunch sakti thee aur na hi tv ja kitchen ki light unke liye pareshani ka sbab ban sakti thee. Iske bawjood hum apni awaz bilkul dheemi rakhte ta ke wo jaag na sake. Hamen dekhne ka ek hi tarika thaa ke wo khud drawing room main chlkar aate magar mere mata pita ke paas unki ek apni choti fridge thee aur sath hi main chai aur coffee maker bhi unke paas thaa. Isliye jab wo khane ke baad ek baar apne kamre main chale jate the to unko kabhi bhi is aur vaapas aane ki jaroorat nahi padti thee. 
Main subeh college jata thaa. College se dopehar ko lautata thaa aur phir rat ko tution jata thaa jabke mere pita subah aath se panch takk kaam karte the. Wo subah che baje ke karib nikalate the kyonki unko thoda door jana padta thaa. Wo sham ko saat baje ke karib laut aate, khana khate, kuch time tv dekhte aur lagbhag nau baje ke karib apne room main chale jate. Jab main tution se vaaas aata tab takk pitaji so chuke hote. Main naha dhokar khana khata aur phir tv dekhne baith jata jisme ab meri ma bhi mera sath nibhane aa jati. Isase meri ma ko itna smay mil jata ke uski dincharya ka ek hissa pitaji ke sath guzarta aur dusra hissa wo mere sath tv dekh kar guzarati. Is dincharya se use na to pitaji ki chinta rehti aur na hi jald sone ki.

Jaise jaise main aur meri ma dono jyada se jyada samay ek sath bitane lage, dhire dhire hamari aatmiyta badhne lagi. Kabhi kabhi ma usi sofe par baithati jis par main baitha hota, halanke wo dusri taraf ke kone par baithati. Yeh siraf samay ki baat thee ke humame se koyi ek phir se hamare chumbano main kuch aur jodne ki koshish karta. Ab swal yeh thaa ke pehal kaun karega aur dusra uska jwab kaise dega. 

Ek vaar weekend par mere pitaji ek seminar main hissa lene sehar se bahar gaye huye the. Unke jane se hum ek dusre ke sath aur bhi khul kar pesh aa rahe the. Main ek nayi film bazaar se kharid laya. Hum dono aram se befikar hokar film dekh rahe the kyonki aaj usko jane ki koyi jaldi nahee thee. Hum dono us raat aur raton ki tulna main bahut der takk ek dusre ke sath baithe rahe. Jehan takk ke din main kharidi film khatam hone ke baad hum tv par ek dusri film dekhne lage. Us raat vakayi hum bahut der takk drawing room main baithe rahe. Ant main khud maine, na ke ma ne keha ke ab humen sona chahiye. 
Reply
01-13-2018, 08:53 PM,
#7
RE: Ye kaisa sanjog
Maine dvd player se dvd nikali usko uske cover main vaapas dala aur phir;tv band kar diya. Jabke wo kitchen main jhuthe bartan sink main daalne lagi take subeh ko unhe dho sake. 
Abb jaisa ke main pehle hi bata chuka hun hamare ghar ke corridor drawing room se suru hote the, sabse pehle mere room ke saamne se guzarate the, uske baad do guest room aur ant main uske bedroom pe jakar khatam hota thaa.

Maine drawing room ka verandah main khulne wala door band kiya jabke usne kitchen aur drawing room ki lights band ki. Uske baad hum neem andhere main chalte huye corridor main aa gaye. 

Aam taur par hamare ratri chumabn ke samay main sofe par baitha thoda aage ko jhukta thaa aur wo mere saamne khadi hokar niche jhuk kar mere hontho par chumban deti thee magar us din wo us jegah hona thaa jehan corridor se wo apne room main chali jati aur main apne room main jo ke mere bedroom ke saamne hona thaa. Hum dono mere bedroom ke darwaje ke aage ek dusre ko subhratri bolne ke liye ruk gaye. Ab humen wo chumban hum dono ke ek dusre ke saamne khade hokar karna thaa jsme ke use apna chehra upar ko uthana thaa jabke mujhe apna chehra niche ko jhukana thaa.

Us chumban ki aatmiyta aur gehrayi pehle chumbano ke muqabale khud ba khud badh gayi thee, raat ke andhere ki sarsarahat use rahasaypuran bana rahi thee. Hum itne karib the ke main uske mummon ko apni chati ke nazdik mehsoos kar sakta thaa, yeh pehl vaar thaa jab hum aise itne karib the. Mujhe nahi malum ke uske mumme vakayi mujhe chu rahe the ja nahi magar wo meri pasliyon ke bahut karib the, bahut bahut karibi! Uske mumme hain hi itne bade bade!

Hum dono ne us din kafi waqat eksath guzara thaa, khub maza kia thaa, ek dusre ke sath ka bahut anand mila thaa. Man main anand ki tarange phoot rahi thee aur jo atamglani maine pichle gile chumbano ko lekar mehsoos ki thee wo poori terah se gayab ho chuki thee. Mahol ki ronanchikta main tab aur bhi ijafa ho gaya jab usne apna hath (asavdhani se) mere bayen baju par sahare ke liye rakh diya.
Jab usne upar takk pahunchane ke liye khud ko upar ki aur uthaya to maine nishchit taur pe uske bhari mummo ko apni chati se ragadate mehsoos kiya. Maine khud ko ekdam se uttejit hote nehsoos kiya aur phir na jane kaise, khud ba khud meri jivha bahar nikli aur mere hotho ko poora gil kar diya jab wo uske hontho ko lagbhag chune wale the. Wo mujhe itne andhere main honth gile karte nahi dekh payi hogi.

jaise hi hamare honth ek dusre se chuye, pratikiriya main khud ba khud uska dusra hath mere dusre baju par chala gaya aur ise sanket man mere hontho ne khud ba khud uske hontho par halka sa dwab badha diya.

Yeh ek chota sa chumban thaa magar lambe samay takk apna asar chodne wala thaa.

Uske honth bhi nam the. Usne unhe nam kiya thaa jaise maine apne honth nam kiye the. Kyonki main uske upar jhuka huya thaa, isliye jab hamare honth aapas main mile aur unhono ek dusre par halka sa dwab dala to dono ki saghi nami ke karan uska upar ka honth mere hontho ki gehrayi main fisal gaya jabke mera niche wlaa honth uske hontho ki gehrayi main fisal gaya. Aur sehajata se dono ne ek dusre jke hontho ko apne hontho main samete rakha. Maine uska mukhras chakha aur wo bhut hi meetha thaa. Mujhe yakeen thaa usne bhi mera mukhras chakha thaa. 

Jaise hi usko ehsaas huya ke hamara subhratri ka wo hala sa chumban ek asli chumban main tabdeel ho chuka hai to wo ekdamse pareshan ho uthi. Uske hathon ne mujhe dheere se door kiya aur usne apna mukh mere mukh se door hata liya. Hamara chumban thoda hadbadi main khatam huya, wo dheere se goodnight budbudayi aur jaldi jaldi apne room ko nikal gayi. 

Main kam se kam wahan das minute khada raha hoyunga phir thoda hosh aane par khud ko ghsitata apne bedroom main gaya aur jakar apne be par lait gaya.

Mere liye yeh svabhavik hi thaa ke main agle din kuch bura mehsoos karte huye jaagta. Humne ek dusre ko aise chuma tha jaisa hamare rishte main bilkul bhi svikarya nahi tha aur fir yeh baat ke wo lagbhag whan se bhaagte huye gayi thee, se sabit hota thaa ke humne kuch galat kiya thaa. Mujhe samagh nahi aa raha thaa ke hum ek dusre ka saama kaise karenge

Hum ise ek bura haadsa maan kar bhul sakte the aur apni zindagi ki aur laut sakte the, magar asliyat main yeh koyi haadsha nahi thaa. Humne ise svaichcha se kiya thaa isme koyi shak nahi thaa.

1. Maine vaastav main apni sagi ma ko chuma thaa aur wo janti thee ke maine use jis terah chuma thaa vaise main use chum nahi sakta thaa. Yeh baat ke wo lagbhag wahan se bhagti huyi gayi thee, sabit karti thee ke mera use chumna galat thaa aur wo khud yeh janti thee ke yeh galat hai isliye usne is par vahin viram laga diya isase pehle ke hum is raaste par aur aage badhte.

Magar humne is samasaya se nijat paane ka asan tarika chuna. Humne aise dikhava kiya jaise kuch huya hi nahi thaa. Vaise bhi aisa kuch kaise ghat sakta thaa? Wo meri ma thee aur main uska beta. Kuch galat nahi ghat sakta thaa. Jo bhi pachtawa thaa ja saram thee wo siraf hamari chanchalata aur shararat ki vejah se thee. 

Mujhe jalad hi samagh main aa gaya ke insani dimag ki yehi fitrat hoti hai ke wo kisi galti ki vejah se hone wali atamglni ko yehi keh kar taal deta hai ke galti ki vejah avashayanbhvi thee. Humne ek sukhad, atmiyata se bharpoor sham bitayi thee isliye yeh svabhavik hi thaa hum ek dusre ko khud ke itne nazdik mehsoos kar rahe the ke wo chumban svabhavik hi thaa. Iske ilawa itna gehra andhera thaa ke humen kuch dikhayi bhi to nahi de raha thaa. 

Jab ek baar pachtawe ki bhavna dil se nikal gayi aur us 'shararat' ko nyayochit tehra diya gaya to mere liye ma ko nayi roshni main dekhna bahut mushkil nahi reh gaya thaa. Main vakayi main ma ko ek nayi roshni main dekh raha thaa. Main use aise roop main dekh raha thaa jiski aur pehle kabhi mera dhyaan hi nahi gaya thaa.

Maine dhyaan diya ke wo naye aur adhunik kapdon ki tulna main purane kapdon main kahin jyada achhi lagti hai. Wo nayi aur mehangi skirts ki tulna main apni purani fiki pad chuki jeans main kahin jayada achchi dikhti thee. Wo blouse ke muqable t-shirt main main jyada sundar lagti thee. Uske baal choti main bandhe jyada achche lagte the na ke jab wo hair saloon se koyi style banva kar aati the. Yehan jis khas bindu ki aur main ishara karna chahta hun wo yeh hai ke wo mujhe vastav main bahhut sundar nazar aane lagi thee-----ek sundar nari ki terah.
Reply
01-13-2018, 08:53 PM,
#8
RE: Ye kaisa sanjog
Ma kaisi dikhti hai, main isme khasi dilchapsi lene laga. Meri nazren chori chori uske badan ka muyana karne lagi jaise wo mujhe sundar nazar aane wali kisi sundar ladki ka karti. Mujhe ma ko, uske badan aur uske badan ki vishestayon ka is terah chori chori avlokan karne main bahut anand aane laga. Wo mujhe har din jyada, aur jyada sundar dikhne lagi aur main bhi khud ko aksar uttejit hote mehsoos karne laga.

Ma ki taraf se bhi kuch badlav dekhne ko mil raha thaa. Maine mehsos kiya ke wo ab jyada hansmukh ho gayi thee. Wo pehle ki apeksha jyada muskrati thee, uski chaal main kuch jyada lachak aa gayyi thee, aur to aur maine use kayi baar kuch gungunate bhi suna thaa. Uske svbhav main hamari 'us maze ki raat' ke baad nishchit taur par badlav aa gaa thaa. Chahe usne us raat mujhe door hata diya thaa aur jo kuch hamare bich ho raha thaa use rok diya thaa iske bavjood hamare bich gnishtata pehle ke muqable badh gayi thee. Hum ek dusre ke nazdik aa gaye the- adhyatmik drishtise bhi aur sarirak drishti se bhi. 

Wo mujhe achchi lagne lagi thee aur maine use ek do maukon par bola bhi thaa ke wo bahut achchi lag rahi hai. Usne bhi do teen baar meri prashansa ki thee, matlab ek terah se mujhe vishwas dilaya thaa ke hamare bich jo kuch bhi ho raha thaa vo dono aur se thaa na ke siraf meri aur se. Kam se kam meri soch anusar to aisa hi thaa, main poora din ma ke khayalon main hi gum rehne laga thaa. Ek din umang main maine uske liye chocolates bhi kharide.

Maine uske mumme dekhne ke har mouke ka fayada uthaya. Uske mumme itne badhiya, itne bade-bade aur itne sundar the ke mera man unki prashansa se bhar uthta. Ho sakta hai is baat ka talukk is baat se ho ke kabhi un par mera haq thaa magar wo the bahut sundar. Main nahi janta uska dhyaan meri nazar par gaya ke nahi magar agar usne dhyaan diya thaa to usne meri tank jhank ko svikar kar liya thaa aur iski aadi ho gayi thee.

Mera dhyan uski peeth par bhi gaya jab bhi wo mujse vipreet disha ki aur mukh kiye hoti. Uski peeth bahut hi sundar thee. Uski gand ka akar bahut dilkash thaa, ubhari huyi aur gol matol, bahut hi madak thee. Aur use us madak gand ka istemal karn bhi khoob aata thaa. Uuski chaal main esi kamuk si lachak thee ke main aksar usase sammohit ho jata thaa.

Ek din mujhe dekhne ka achcha mauka mila, mera matlab poori terah khul kar uska chehra dekhne ka mauka. Wo kuch kar rahi thee aur uski ankhe kahin aur zamin huyi theen, is terah se ke wo mujhe apni aur ghurte nahi dekh sakti thee. Maine uska chehra, uske gaal, uske honth aur uski thodhi dekhi aur mera man uski sundarta se mohit ho utha. Maine dhyaan diya ke ma ke honth badi khubsurati se gadhe huye the jo apne aap main bahut madak the. Unhe dekh kar chumne ka man hota thaa. Inse hamare chumbano ko lekar meri bhavnayen aur bhi praghad ho gayi theen Jab mere dil main yeh khayal aaya ke hamare ratri chumbano ke samay yehi wo honth the jinhe mere hontho ne sparash kiya thaa. Wo yaad aate hi munh main pani aa gaya. 

Maine is baat par bhi dhyan diya ke wo bahut pyari, bahut akarshak hai. Wo aksar kuch n kuch aisa karti thee ke main abhibhut ho uthta. Kitchen main kuch galat ho jane par jis terah wo munh fulati thee, jab kabhi kisi kaam main vyasat hone par phone ki ghanti bajti thee aur uski tyorian chadh jati theen, jab wo bagiche main kisi fool ko dekhkar muskrati thee. Mujhe usme ek bahut hi pyari aur bahut hi sundar nari nazar aane lagi thee.

Jitna jyada meri usme dilchapsi badhti gayi utna hi jyada main uske prem main pagal hota gaya. 'Pagal' yehi wo lagaz hai jo main samjhata hun meri halat ko sahi bayan kar sakta hai. Magar main nahi janta thaa ke uski bhavnayen kaisi thee ja wo kya mehsoo karti thee.

Yeh jaise avashyanbhavi thaa ke mere pita ko phir se sehar se bahar jana thaa aur lagta thaa jaise wo isi mouke ka intezar kar rahi thee. Is baar khud usne hamare raat ko dekhne ke liye film khiridi thee aur main us film ko uske sath dekhne ke liye sehmat thaa. Humne raat ke khane ko bahar ke ek restran se mangwaya aur dono ne eksath us khane ka bahut anand liya. Hum dono ne sofe par bithkar film dekhi, jisme main sofe ki ek taraf baitha huya thaa aur wo dusri taraf. Film khatam hone ke baad humne tv par thoda samay kuch aur dekha, ant main hum tv dekh dekh kar thak gaye. Apne kamron main jane ki humen koyi jaladbzi nahi thee aur na hi subhratri kehne ki koyi jaldbazi thee. Hum tabhi uthe jab aur baithna mushkil ho gaya thaa aur humen uthna hi thaa. 

Usne kitchen ki lights band ki aur darwaje chek kiye ke wo sahi se band hain ja nahi jabke maine dvd se film nikal kar uske cover main dali aur remotes ke sath dusari jegah rakhi aur sabhi electronik upkarno ko band kar diya. Pichli baar ki achanak aur rukhi smapti ke bavjood, hamare bich koyi atpatapan nahi thaa. Sabh kuch sahi, sehaj aur shant lag raha thaa. Jab hum drawing room se uthkar corriodor ki aur chalne lage to mera dil thodi tezi se dhadkane laga. Main aas lagaye baith thaa ke shaayad aaj phir se mujhe hamari aur raaton ke chumbano ki tulna main thoda gehra, thoda thos chumban lene ko milega. Hamari pichli raat jab mere pita ghar se bahar gaye huye the, bahut aatmiyata se guzari thee aur hamara subhratri chumban hamare aamtaur ke chmbno se jyada thos thaa. Main umeed kar raha thaa ke agar pichli raat se jyada nahi to kam se kam hamare chumban ki gehayi us raat jitni to hogi, main umeed kar raha thaa ke shaayad mujhe uske mukhras ka swad chakhne ko milega ja ho sakta hai mujhe uske hontho ke andruni hisse ko mehsoos karne ka mauka bhi mil jaye.

Chalte chalte jab hum mere bedroom ke door ke aage ruke, to mere dil ki dhadkane bahut tez ho gayi theen. Meri saanse ukhadne lagi theen. Magar haye! Usne mujhe kuch karne ka mauka nahi diya. Wo mere jyada nazdik bhi nhi aayi. Maine dhyaan diya usne hamare bich ek khas doori banaye rakhi thee. 

Mujhe bahut nirasha huyi. Usne hamare bich aatmiyta ko ek hadd takk rakhne ka jo faisla kiya thaa, mujhe uska samman karna thaa. Yeh mante huye ke hum dono main esi aatmiyta sambhav nahi ho sakti, uske liye apne honth sukhe rakhna asan thaa take wo chumban siraf subhratri ki subhkamna matar hota. Magar phir bhi kam se kam main, uske sath bitayi us sukad raat ke anand ki lehron main khud ko tairta mehsoos kar sakta thaa. Kam se kam hamara sath pehle ki tulna main jyada arathpuran thaa, jyada dostana ho gaya thaa.

Wo apne kamre main chali gayi aur main apne. 
Reply
01-13-2018, 08:53 PM,
#9
RE: Ye kaisa sanjog
Sabh kuch sahi thaa. Pehle bhi kuch galat ghatit nahi huya thaa aur na hi ab huya thaa. Yeh bahut badi rahat thee ke humne sham aur raat ka adhiktar samay ek sath bitaya thaa aur maryada ki rekha na to chuyi gayyi thee, na hi paar ki gayi thee aur na hi use mityaa gaya thaa. Aur humne pooa samay khub maza bhi kiya thaa! 

Main rahat mehsoos kar raha thaa aur shanti bhi ke humne milkar poora samay achche se bitaya thaa aur is baar use na to mujhe dhakelna pada thaa aur nahi apne room ki aur bhagna pada thaa. Hamara rishta lagta thaa aur bhi pripakav ho gaya tha jisne theek esi hi pichli raat ko huyi galtiyon se bahut kuch seekh liya thaa, aur sath hi un galtiyon ko nazarandaz karna bhi seekh liya thaa thaa.

Koyi pandreh bees minute baad mere darwaje par dastak huyi.


"Come in" main bola to usne darwaa khola aur andar dakhil huyi.

Usne kapde badal kar nightie pehan li thee aur tabhi mujhe ehsaas huya ke hamari raat bhinn hone ka ek karan yeh bhi thaa ke film dekhne ke smay usne jeans aur t-shirt pehni huyi thee na ke nightie jaise wo aam taur par raat ko hamare ikatthe samay bitane ke samay pehnati thee.

Maine use us nightie main pehle kabhi nahi dekha thaa. Wo dekhne main nayi lag rahi thee. Wo uske mummo par badi khubsurti se jhul rahi thee. Nightie ki doriyan use itni achche se nahi sambhale huyi theen jitne achche se uske mumme use sambhale huye the. Uske nange kadhe aur ardhnagan janghe meri ankho ke saamne apne poore shabab par thee aur uski patli si nightie se jhankta uska gadraya badan bahut kamuk lag reh thaa.

"Mujhe neend nahi aa rahi" wo boli. "Maine socha main tumhare sath thoda aur samay bita loon"

“Mujhe neend nahi aa rahi” wo boli “maine socha kyon na tumhare sath kuch aur samay bita loon”

Usne keha ke use neend nahi aa rahi aur mera dhyaan ekdam se uski us baat par chala gaya jisme usne keha thaa ke kabhi kabhi wo itni kamottejit hoti hai ke use neend bhi nahi aati. Kya yeh sambhav thaa ke meri ma us samay us pal kamottejit thee? Main janta thaa agar wo kamottejit hai to nishchit taur par meri vejah se hai. Yeh vichar ke meri ma mere karan itni kamottejit hai ke wo so bhi nahi sakti , ne mere andar jal rahi kamottejna ki aag ko aur bhadka diya.

"Haan, haan ma! Kyon nahi! Mujhe bahut achcha lagega. Mujhe khud neend nhi aa rahi!" Maine use keha.

“thanks” use mere jwab se kafi khushi mehsoos huyi lagti thee. Wo mere computer wali kursi par baith gayi. Mujhe aisa laga jaise wo kuch pareshan si hai. Wo kursi ko apne kulhon se dayin se bayin aur bayin se dayin aur ghumati mere kamre main idhar udhar dekkh rahi thee. Main apne bed par baitha bas use dekh raha thaa. wo mujhe nahi dekh rahi thee. 

Kuch samay baad usne pucha “Tumhe film kaisi lagi?” uski saans thodi si ukhadi huyi thee.

“Achi thee. Mujhe bahut maza aaya” maine use jwab diya. Mujhe ache se yaad thaa wo swal hum kuch samay pehle drawing room main ek dusre se puch chuke the magar phir bhi maine usase pucha “tumhe kaisi lagi ma”

Jab bhi wo kuch bolti to uski saans ukhadi huyi mehsoos hoti. Meri sath bhi ab yehi samasya thee, magar utni nahi jitni uske sath. Jab hum wahan khamoshi se baithe the tab mujhe dhyaan aaya ke usne mere sath siraf aur jyada samay hi nahi bitana balke uske man main iske ilawa aur bhi kuch thaa. Magar takleef is baat ki thee is ‘aur kuch’ ka koyi suruaati bindu nahi thaa. Main koyi galat andaza lagane ka khatra uthana nahi chahta thaa aur wo andaza lagane main meri madad karne ke liye apni taraf se koyi sanket koyi ishara kar nahi rahi thee. 

Main phir bhi khush thaa, wo wahan mere paas mojud thee aur main use us nightie main dekh pa raha thaa. uske mumme vakayi main bahut sundar the. Main unse apni nazren nahi hata pa raha thaa. mujhe tajub thaa agar usne dhyaanbdiya thaa ke kis terah meri nazren uske badan ki tareef kar rahi thee. Usne apni nazren farash par zamayi huyi thee aur apne panv mod kar kursi ke niche rakhe huye the. 

Ek baar jab khamoshi bardashat se bahr ho gayi , wo kursi se uth khadi ho gayi aur mere kamre ki diwar par lage posters ko dekhne lagi aur phir wo mere bookcase ko dekhne lagi jisme meri kuch kitaben padi theen. Uske kamre main tehlane se uski aur se kuch hawa meri taraf aayi aur wo hawa apne sath ek bahut manmohak si sungadh lekar aayi jise meri indriyon ne mehsoos kiya. Maine usase usi pal pucha “ma, tumne aaj naya perfume lagaya hai?” 

Wo meri taraf mudi. Uske chehre par muskrahat thee aur main nahi janta us muskrahat ka karan kaya thaa. lagta thaa jaise main bas uske badan par naye perfume ki pehchan karke hi use khush kar sakta thaa. “haan, naya hai. Tumhe achcha laga?” 

Uska swal svabhavik hi thaa. “Huun ma, bahut achcha hai” maine use jwab diya.

“Thanks” wo boli. Wo mere nazdik aayi, jo main yakeen se keh sakta hoon ke uski koshish thee ke main uske perfume ki mehak achche se le saku. Wo mere bed ke sath rakhe naightstand ke paas aayi to nightstand ke table lamp se nikalti roshni se uska jism naha utha. Tab jakar maine dhyaan diya ke uske chehre par halka sa shringar laga huya thaa.


Ab jakar mujhe ehsaas huya ke wo apne kamre main khud ko tyaar karne ke liye gayi thee kyonki use mere kamre main aana thaa. usne mere kamre main aane ki yojna pehle se bana rakhi thee aur aane se pehle usne khud ko thoda sa sajaya thaa, sanvara thaa. chetan ja achetan man se, usne koshish ki thee ke wo achchi lage, jaahir thaa usne mujhe achhi lagne liye kiya thaa. Aur yeh vichar ke usne is liye shringar kiya thaa ke mujhe sundar lag sake bahut bahut uttejak thaa, kamuk thaa. 

Hamare bich kuch ghat raha thaa. itna main poore vishwas se keh sakta thaa ke hamare bich kuch khas ghat raha thaa. Main uske perfume ki sugandh nazdik se lene ke bahane us par thoda sa jhuk sakta thaa aur ho sakta thaa hamare bich wo “kuch khas” hone ka suruati bindu ban jata. Magar mujhe tab sugha jab wo nightstand se door hatt gayi. Maine ek behatreen mauka ganva diya thaa jo shaayad usne mujhe khud diya thaa. 

Tab maine faisla kiya ke mujhe bed se uth jana chahiye aur uske thoda nazdik hone ki koshish karni chahiye, sahi main mujhe aisa hi karna chahiye thaa. Main janta thaa agar maine uske nazdik jane ki koshish ki to kuch na kuch hona tayy thaa. Mujhe ek bahana chahiye thaa uthne ka aur bed se utarne ka. Tab hum jismani taur par ek dusre ke karib aa jate aur kaun janta hai Tab kaya hota. Main siraf ek hi bahana bana sakta thaa; bathroom jane ka. 

Jab main bathroom se bahar aaya to dekha wo phir se usi kursi par baithi huyi hai aur mere bahar aane ka intezar kar rahi hai. Jis andaz main wo baithi thee, bada hi kamuk thaa. wo kursi ke kinare par baithi huyi thee, uske hath kursi ko aage se aur jangho ke bahar se pakde huye the, uski tange sidhi tani huyi thee, aur uska jism thoda sa aage ko jhuka huya thaa. uski nightie uske ghutno se thoda sa upar uthi huyi thee aur uski jangho ka kaafi hissa nagan thaa, uski janghe bahut hi sundar dikh rahi thee. 
Reply
01-13-2018, 08:54 PM,
#10
RE: Ye kaisa sanjog
Mujhe apni almari tak jane ke liye uske paas se gujarnaa thaa. jab main uske paas se uske panv ke upar se guzra to maine uske panv ekdam se hilte dekhe jaise use mere itne paas se guzarne ke karan mere dwara kuch karne ki ashanka ho. Shaayad wo sparsh pana chahti thee. Us samay wo bahut hi madak lag rahi thee aur main use chune ke liye mara ja raha thaa.

Main bed par us sathan par baitha jo uski kursi ke bikul nazdik thaa. Ab hum ek dusre ke saamne baithe the aur hamare bich doori bahut kam thee. Mere panv lagbhag uske panv ko chu rahe the. Hum dono wahan khamoshi se baithe the kyonki hamare paas kehne ke liye kuch bhi nahi thaa. Kehte bhi to akhir kya kehte? Mahaul bahut hi pyarnuma thaa magar hum ek dusre se pyar jata nahi sakte the. Main aage badhkar uska hath nahi tham sakta thaa. Wo apni jegah se uthkar bed par mere sath nahi baith sakti thee. Hamare hilne dulne par jaise yeh ek bandhan laga huya thaa, jo humen wahan is terah baithaye huye thaa. Hum paththar ki murtiyon ki terah jadvat the aur umeed kar rahe the ke kuch ho aur humen is bandhan se chutkara mil jaye. 

Agar kuch ho sakta thaa to wo yehi thaa ke wo kehti;”mujhe ab chalna chahiye”

Main use jane nahi dena chahta thaa aur mujhe yakeen thaa wo bhi jana nahi chahti hai. Magar kahin par, man ke kisi andhere kone main ek awaz humen hamare us ratri sath ko wahin khatam kar dene ke liye baar baar agah ka rahi thee. Us mahol main bahut kuch ho jane ki sambhavna thee.

Usne siraf itna keha thaa ke use ab sone ke liye jana chahiye magar usne apni jegah se uthne ji koyi koshish na ki, wo waise hi baithi thee. Tab mujhe laga ke usne mujhe ek chota sa avsar diya hai. 

"Magar kyon? Tum kyon jana chahti ho ma?" Jab mere munh se wo lafaz nikle to main uski pratikiriya ko lekar dara hua thaa

Main dar raha tha kyonk mujhe lag raha thaa ke usne mujhe jo mauka diya hai wo achetan mann se diya hai, isliye ho sakta hai wo mere lafzo ke piche chipe mere maksad ko padh na paye. Main nahi chahta thaa ke wo jane ke liye samanay tarak de; ke wo thaki huyi hai ya use neend aa rahi hai ja raat bahut ho gayi gai. Main use yeh kehte huye sunana chahta thaa ke wo isliye jana chahti hai kyonki use dar thaa ke agar wo wahan aur jyada der tak ruki to kuch aisa ho sakta thaa jo nahi hona chahiye thaa.

Main janta thaa ke wo bhi is baat ko mehsoos kar sakti hai ke hamare bich kuch hone ki sambhavna hai, isliye wo yeh baat apne hontho par la sakti thee. Asal main khud mujhe koyi andaza nahi thaa ke agar wo wahan ruki to kaya ho sakta thaa. Hamare rishte ki maryada itni unchi thee ke us samay bhi, un halaton main wahan is terah uske samne baith kar main jyada se jyada ek madhur chumban ki umeed kar sakta thaa. Halanke meri pent main mera pathar ki trrah tana huya lauda is baat ki gwahi bhar raha thaa ke agar wo jyada der wahan rukti to kya kaya ho sakta thaa.

Mera lauda tana huya thaa! Main kamounmad main jal raha thaa! Aur main kabool karta hun ke meri is halat ki vejah mei ma thee, magar rona bhi isi baat ka thaa ke wo keri ma thee.

Main janta thaa ke uski halat bhi kuch kuch mere jaise hi hai. Hum ek dusre ke itne paas paas baithe the ke ek dusre ke jsm ki garmi ko mehsoos kar sakte the. Magar is dharti par jite ji yeh namumkin thaa ke hum apni uttejna ki us halat ko ek dusre ke smne svikar kar lete, ja ek dusre ko is bare main koyi ishara kar sakte ja vastav main hum apni uttejna ko lekar kuch kar sakte.

Usne meri baat ka jwab bhut der se diya. Wo apne pairon pa nazar tikaye phusphasayi, "mujhe nahi malum"

Mujhe laga ke anukul pristhition main uska jwab ekdam sahi thaa. Usne un chand lafzon main bahut kuch keh diya thaa.

"Yehan par hamare siva aur koyi nahi hai" maine bhi phusphasa kar keha. Meri baat sidhi si thee, magar un halaton ke maddenazar unke mayne bahut gehre the.

"Lekin agar main rukti bhi hoon to hum karenge kaya?" Uska jwab bahut jaldi aur sehjata se aaya magar mujhe nahi lagta thaa ke vastav main un lafzon ka koyi khas matlab bhi thaa.

Mere paas lakhon sujhav the ke uske rukne par hum kaya kaya kar sakte the magar mere munh se siraf itna hi nikla, "kuch bhi ma, jo tumhe achha lage" 

Hum wahan kuch der bina kuch kiye aise hi khamoshi se baithe rahe. Shaayad yehi thaa jo hum kar sakte the, bass khamoshi se baith sakt the, yeh sohte huye ke vastav main hum kaya kaya kar skte the, bina kuch bhi vaisa kiye.

Antetah khamoshi asehay ho hgayi. Wo aur jayda der sthir nahi baith sakti thee. Wo ekdam se uthkar khadi ho gayi.


Main uske us terah ekdam se uth jane se dar sa gaya. Main bhi usk sath uth kar khada ho gaya, ike falsrup ab hum ek dusre ke samne khade the.

Hum ek dusre ke behad paas paas khade the. Hum ek dusre ke samne raat ke gehan sannate main chehre ke samne chehra kiye khade the.

Usne pehla kadam uthaya, shaayad wo iske liye wo mujhse jayada tayyar thee.

Usne pehla kadam uthaya, shaayad wo iske liye mujhse jyada tyyar thee. Wo aage badhi aur usne mujhe alingan main le liya. Mujhe iski katayi umeed nahi thee;isliye main uske alingan ke eliye tyyar bhi nahi thaa.

Usne apni bahen meri kamar ke gird lappet di aur tezi se mujhe apne alingan main kas liya. Maine pratikiriya main aisa kuch bhi nahi kiya jiski usne umeed ki hogi. Maine bahut hi bedhang aur anupyukat tarike se use apne alingan main lene ki koshish ki magar isase pehle ke main use apne alingan main le pata , usne tezi se mujhe chod diya aur utni hi tezi se wo wahan se nikal gayi. 

Usne apne andar jo bhavnayon ka avesh dabaya huya thaa main use mehsoos kar sakta thaa. mujhe umeed thee usne bhi mere andar ke us avesh ko mehsoos kiya hoga. Agar isharon ki baat ki jaye to hum dono poori terah se tyyar the magar hamare kuch karne par maryada ka param pratibandh laga huya thaa. hum siraf wohi kar sakte the jo hamare rishte main svikarya thaa; pehle ke halaton ke maddenazar ek chumban; ab ke halation anusar ek alingan.


Yeh siraf ek alingan thaa, aur kuch bhi nahi magar uske mumme mere sine par do naram, mulayam garmahat liye jalte huye nishan chod gaye the. Uske jane ke bahut der baad tak bhi main us alokik annad main dubta itrata raha.


Yeh poori terah se sthapit ho chukka thaa ke kuch na kuch ghat raha thaa aur yeh saaf thaa ke hum dono us ‘kuch na kuch’ main hissa le rahe the. Magar samasaya yeh thee ke hum jyada se jyada ek dusre ke gile hontho ko chum sakte the ya hontho se hontho par halka sa dwab daal sakte the ja alinganbadh ho sakte the. Main uski peeth ko apne hatho se sehla nahi sakta thaa jaisa main karna chahta thaa. Main uske hontho main honth daal use khule dil se chum nahi sakta thaa. Main uske mummo ko ichchanusar chu nahi sakta thaa. Merale hath uske mummo ko chune ke liye tarasate the magar main aisa nahi kar sakta thaa.


Main soch raha thaa ke meri terah uske bhi arman honge. Jis terah main use chune ke liye tarasata thaa kya wo bhi esi ichchayen pale baithi thee. Ab tak jo kuch hamare bich huya huya thaa us hisab se to uske bhi mere jaise kuch arman honge. Magar mujhse jayada shaayad wo khud ke armano ko kabu kiye huye thee. Akhirkar main ek marad thaa, aur ek marad hone ke nate, mere liye apni sagi ma ke liye kamniy bhavnayen rakhna koyi bahut badi baat nahi thee. Magar ek ma hone ke nate, uske liye apne bete ke liye esi bhavnayen rakhna bahut galat baat thee. Magar isme, koyi shak nahi thaa ke hamare bich wo kamniy bhavnayen mojud thee


Maine faisla kar liya thaa ke ab main sidhe sidhe hamare bich jismani sampark badhane ki koshish karunga. 


Us raat ne hamare rishte main aur bhi ghnishtata la di thee. Hamari agli raat sabse badhiya rahi. Hum ek dusre se kafi sehajata se baat kar rahe the, balke bich bich main ek dusre ko ched bhi rahe the. Aisa lagta thaa jaise hamare rishte ne nayi unchayi ko chu liya thaa magar is sab ke bavjood thodi doori thee jo shaayad humen apne bich banayi rakhni jaroori thee. 


Agli raat jab usne keha ke use jana chahiye to main bhi uske sath jane ke liye uth khada huya. Mujhe uske baad wahan akele baithne ka man nahi thaa. yeh hamar nayi dincharya ban chuki thee aur main iska jyada se jyada fayda uthana chahta thaa. 

Humne battiyan band ki, darwajon ko band kiya aur corridor ki aur badh gaye. Jab hum mere room ke samne pahunch gaye to main use ‘goodnight’ kehne ke liye ruk gaya.

Jab usne dekha ke main corridor ke bicho bich ruk gaya hun, usne corridor ke dusre sire ki aur dekha jehan se corridor uske bedroom ki side ko mudh jata thaa. main samagh gaya ke wo yehi dekhne ki koshish kar rahi thee ke wahan koyi hai to nahi, jiska siddha matlab thaa ke wo ykini banana chahti thee ke kahin mere pitaji to wahan se humen nahi dekh rahe the. Usne mujhe darwaje ki aur dhakela. Jahir thaa wo corriodor main ‘goodnight’ nahi kehna chahti thee. 

Ye apne aap main bahut romanchkari thaa. Corridor main kisi dwara dekhe jane se bachne ke liye use meri aur jukhna thaa. Aisa karte waqat use na chahte huye bhi apna jism mere jism par dhire se dabana pada. Main use apni bahon main lena chahta thaa magar main aisa kar na saka. Main usase us terah alinganbadh nahi ho sakta thaa. Usne apna jism upar ko uthaya take uske honth mere hontho tak pahunch sake, jisase asavdhani main usne apne mumme meri chati par ragde aur phir mujhe ek chumban diya.


Wo ek nam chumban thaa. Hum dono ne apne honth gile kiye huye the bina is baat ki parwah kiye ke dusra is par etraaj jata sakta hai. Chumban main thoda sa dwab bhi thaa. Hamari dincharya ab ek sade subhratri chumban ki jegah ek alinganbadh subhratri chumban main badal chuki thee. Hamara chumban ab sukhe hontho ka namatar ka sparash na rehkar ab nam lavon ka milan thaa jisme hontho ka hontho par halka sa dwab bhi hota thaa. uske mumme meri chahti par bahut sundar sa ehsaas chod gaye the aur pakde jane ki sambhavna ka romanch alag se thaa. Hum kuch aisa kar rahe the jo humen nahi karna chahiye thaa aur waisa karte hum aram se pakde bhi ja sakte the. Yeh bahut hi romanchpuran thaa, ek se badhkar kayi mayno main. Yeh baat ke wo pakde jane se bachne ki koshish kar rahi thee, uske is chadyantar main shamil hone ki khuleaam gawahi de rahi thee. Yeh ek tarfa nahi thaa.


Yeh baat ke wo mujhse chip kar gopniyta se chumna aur alingan karna chahti thee, yeh saabit karti thee ke uski samagh anusar hamara waisa karna sharamnaak thaa. Aur is baat ke bavjood, ke hamara wo vartav uski nazar main sharamnaak thaa, wo phir bhi mujhe chumna chahti thee, mujhe alingan karna chahti thee, saabit karta thaa ke wo kuch aisa kar rahi thee jo use nahi karna chahiye thaa matlab wo kuch aisa aisa kar rahi thee jo ek ma hone ke nate use nahi karna chahiye thee magar wo, wo sabh karne ki dili khawahishmand thee.


Main kamottejit thaa! Mere andaze se wo bhi poori kamottejit thee. Mujhe uske badan ka mere badan se sparsh bahut anandmayi lag raha thaa. Mgar, yehin hamare liye ek bahut badi samasya thee, wo hamari hadh thee, hum uske age nahi badh sakte the. Main age badhkar uske jism ko apni hasrat anusar chu nahi sakta thaa. Wo apni hasrat mujh par Jahir nahi kar sakti thee. Halanke sabhi sanket ek khas disha main ishara kar rahe the, magar humen aise dikhava karna thaa ke wo disha hai hi nahi. 


Wo wahan mere samne kashan bhar ke liye ruki thee, jaise kuch soch rahi thee. Phir usne mere hath apne hathon main liye aur unhe dhire se dabaya aur phir wo wahan se chali gayi. Main wahan khada raha aur use corridor ke kone se apne room ki muudte dekhta raha. Maine uski bhavnayon ki prablata mehsoos ki thee. Mujhe bura lag raha thaa ke main use apne bhavavesh ki parchandata na dikha saka. Main usase kahin jayada khud par kabu kiye huye thaa.

Hamare bich koyi chakkar chal raha hai, bina shak phir se yeh baat ubhar kar samne aa gayi thee. Uska mere hathn ko thamna aur unhe dabana bahut hi kamuk thaa. Main kamna kar raha thaa ke kash maine use aaj kisi ALAG prakar se chuma hota. Magr ab to wo ja chuki thee, so meri kamna kamna hi rahi. Main bahut hi uttejit thaa. Maine khud se vayda kiya ke agli baar main sabh kuch behtar taike se karne ki koshish karunga. 


Agli raat, main tv dekhne drawing room main nahi gaya. Main dekhna chahta thaa ke wo mujhe dekhne aati hai ja nahi. Main dekhna chahta thaa ke kaya wo hamare bich kisi aur jismani sampark ke liye aati hai jaise wo us raat aayi thee. Maine darwaja thoda sa khula chod diya, ek sanket ke taur par ke main uske aane ki umeed kar raha hoon. 


Maine drawing room se tv ki awaz suni aur bahut nirash huya, balke bahut hatash bhi ho gaya. Ho sakta hai wo mere wahan aane ki umeed lagaye baithi ho. Magar main uska mere kamre main aane ka intezar kar raha thaa. Mujhe esi hasrat karne ke liye bahut bura mehsoos huya, magar wo hasrat poori na hone par aur bhi bura mehsoos huya. Aisa nahi ho sakta thaa. Abhi raat hone ki suruaat huyi thee, itni jaldi uska mere kamre main aana aur wo sabh hona jiski main aas lagye baitha thaa bahut mushkil thaa.
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